t’s said history repeats itself, but as Dan learned not always with the same results. Throughout his high school years, he still bore the brunt of his past. However, in college (fall of ‘76) Dan found he had total anonymity. There wasn’t one familiar face or anyone who knew his former reputation. Free at last from the stigma of his early years, no one teased him and he made friends easily.
The Muppet Show was a hit on television and inspired Dan to resurrect a Muppet-like puppet he made two years earlier. Crudely constructed and topped with a long fall his mother donated, he bestowed the name Cassandra (after Mama Cass) on his creation. Even though Dan considered himself a ventriloquist rather than a puppeteer, he saw no reason not to control the puppet’s arms with rods the same way Jim Henson did with Kermit the Frog. Among other gestures, he used the arms to flip Cassandra’s hair adding lots of “attitude” to her character. Brash, saucy, spunky—this Cassandra suited Dan’s abilities and sense of humor perfectly. But, did he dare risk revealing her to his college mates and chance spoiling his short-lived reprieve?
Dan sang in the mixed choir at MCC and, just for fun (he hoped!), brought Cassandra to rehearsal. It was deja vu all over again. Cassandra joked and sang, disrupting practice. Utterly charmed, the director had Dan perform encores for the neighboring classes throughout the music department. All of them. Every student present saw Dan and his doll—and was captivated!
At MCC’s music department following Cassandra’s debut, Dan enjoyed popularity he had never known before. Between classes, students and teachers gathered around the lounge area to watch Cassandra and Dan’s impromptu performances. Dan found that through Cassandra he could get big laughs having her spout rude remarks he could never get away with saying. Invitations to gatherings and parties gave Dan an outlet to hone routines and showcase new bits of business. At auditions held for a campus talent show, Dan was a shoo-in. When planning a benefit show for music scholarships, the head of the department, Mr. Hendricks, invited Dan and Cassandra to emcee the show. (Just in passing, Dan received two awards from that fund.) Cassandra performed with two other “soloists” in one of the numbers the choir prepared for their annual tour, which included concerts in Vegas and several venues in Los Angeles. As she was a bona fide member of the choir, Cassandra performed dressed in a smaller version of the female members’ formal burgundy gown, tailored especially for her by one of the sopranos. Everyone loved Cassandra. She was the “It” girl at MCC and hanger on, Dan, was right there riding her coattails.
(Author’s note: This same Cassandra regularly appeared on The Wallace & Ladmo Show throughout Dan Horn’s time as a cast member. Thrilled to have been part of the show, she’s especially proud of the little-known fact she never used a puppet-double. In a recent interview, she explained, “For the High-diving-into-a-Ladmo-Bag bits the station wanted to use a stunt puppet but I said ‘no’—it really was me splatting on the floor when I missed.” Concerning the rumors about her and Gerald, she says, “They’re true. I really did have a crush on him. Or maybe it was just his money. Either way, I loved the way he’d stare at me and say, ‘I don’t like felt that talks.’” Gerald could not be reached for comment. Where is she now? Cassandra still enjoys an active performance schedule as the finale in Dan Horn’s act. Collagen injections, Botox and regular dry cleanings maintain her youthful appearance.)
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Dan’s next character debuted in 1978. Originally not intended for audiences outside Dan’s immediate family, the new puppet—a little old man—promptly surpassed Cassandra’s enormous popularity. His persona combined unflattering traits from Dan’s grandfather, a great-aunt and a great-uncle; qualities Dan knew only his parents and brother would recognize, but aspects they would nonetheless find funny. Orson (the name chosen so as not to sound “puppety” like Buford or Charlie) means “bear” and Dan thought the connotation fit the old guy’s personality. Since Dan was 19, Orson’s age became the reverse: 91. Although none of Dan’s family had ever been in show business, making Orson a retired vaudevillian thinly veiled the individuals he parodied. Dan’s family roared with laughter at Orson’s kitchen table premiere. Dan, however, was certain general audiences wouldn’t find humor in the character unless they knew his relatives. He didn’t consider that other people might have elderly relatives and would be able to draw their own parallels. However, the first time Dan appeared with Orson in public at an open-mic night... Well, let’s just say his mama didn’t raise no dummies!
(Author’s note: Of course, this is the Orson who also appeared with Dan on The Wallace & Ladmo Show. Orson’s cheap shots at Wallace’s size often got him into trouble, once resulting in Wallace sitting on him and squashing him flat (literally—they substituted a life-size cardboard cutout of Orson looking like road-kill). Days after the episode aired, a cassette tape arrived at the station from a little girl who angrily expressed outrage at Wallace and Dan for cruelty to puppets. (For real.) Concerning his un-PC jests, Orson recently offered this comment: “It was all Dan; he put words in my mouth. I would never make jokes at Wallace’s expanse—er—expense!” Where is he now? After leaving the show, Orson underwent a complete image makeover (finally acquiring ears!) and spent the years since touring with Dan. Today, he remains Dan Horn’s right-hand man. He is still 91.)
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